The Illusion of Suffering Between Subject and Object

J. Krishnamurt said, “In the gap between subject and object lies the entire misery of humankind.”
To what was he pointing?

Spatial separation is an illusion created by thought. Pure awareness in this moment reveals that, although there is the appearance of a richly-textured myriad of forms and surfaces, there is only One Life. But thought is in the business of mapmaking. It is in the business of illusion. It maps out reality, creating boundaries where no actual boundaries exist. Thought creates a self in relation to the rest of life. This self defines itself against or in relation to the other people and other objects, all of which are also creations of thought. It creates an illusory boundary between self and other, between self and its environment, between self and life, and between one object and another. A quiet mind reveals that there is in fact no spatial separation. There are no such boundaries. Thought will never reveal this. Thought is the mapmaker.

Conflict in relationships arises automatically when these illusory spatial boundaries are taken to be true. You believe you–a thought–are separate from this other person–another thought. You are trying to define a “me” as against or in relation to the “other.” This is, by its very nature, self-centered action, which will surely bring about ambition, conflict, suffering, and separation.

When you reduce the mystery of this One Life happening now to a separate “me” and a separate "you,” you are doing this for the benefit of your story of self. You are seeking to know who you are in relation to the other. The fear of not-knowing is so overwhelming that a dream of self is created out of pure nothingness. You want to succeed, but you can only succeed at the expense of others' failures. You want to love, but in your desire to seek love from particular things and objects, you create disdain, dislike, or even hatred for other things. You want to be beautiful, but your beauty is only possible if others' are not beautiful. Who would you be without this mirror of relationship? You make a "me" out of thin air, a "me" that only exists in relationship to the other. The startling thing about enlightenment is that it reveals that there is in fact no separate self. Thus, this entire game of separation is a play of thought. The conflict seen in the world between you and the others that you are in competitition with is nothing more than a manifestation of a mind that is deeply confused, trying desparately to hold onto some self-concept. But all self-concepts are illusions. They are the cause of suffering. Whenever you hold onto an illusion, you welcome the suffering and conflict it engenders.

In your illusion of separation, your relationships are bound to run into conflict. You want this other person to be or act according to your wishes or to give you something that you think you need or lack. Perhaps it is love, attention, praise, acknowledgment, happiness or even to do some chore around the house. This "me" is nothing more than a story of lack constantly chasing more. It looks to the other person to fulfill that lack. Therefore, your relationships are not about love. They are about personal gratification. You do not realize that you are simply dreaming. Your dream is a dream of self-centeredness. Your thoughts of others constitute your dream. They are your thoughts. Do you see that? You are dreaming this image of the other person in your mind. Then you want the person to do as you wish or give you something. You do not realize that you are only relating to your own thoughts. You therefore just want your own thought to paint a good picture of self that you can feel good about.

Wanting someone to change is not love. You are wanting your own image of this person to change. This is your image. You have created this image of what the other person will or should do for you, then you project that image out onto the world, not realizing that it is purely your own projection. It has nothing to do with an “other.” You are bringing separation and conflict into the world through this dream. Your story of another person is your story, yours and yours alone. You and this so-called other person are not at all separate. Beyond your thoughts, there is only this moment, this One Life, one spirit appearing in a myriad of forms. Until this is seen, there will be conflict.

Temporal separation is also an illusion created by thought. This is what gives rise to the spiritual search, which is nothing more than a belief system that this moment is not good enough, and therefore that you must find something better in the future. But future is merely a presently-arising thought. Therefore, your spiritual search is nothing more than you–a thought–chasing future–another thought. Until this is realized, you will continue to feel as if enlightenment, God, happiness, and love are somehow in the future, separate from the life that you are in this moment.

The illusory spiritual search keeps the focus on you and how you believe you do not have what you want yet, and that you have not found what you need. The search itself is self-centeredness. Until it is realized that this moment is all there is, and that enlightenment is your natural state in this moment, you will continue spinning around yourself in methods and practices designed to bring about some future state.

This search manifests in various self-deluding ways . . .

You believe you–a thought–are separate from this other thought–“God.” So you set out on a spiritual journey to find him. You are seeking union with God, not realizing that the truth to which the word “God” is pointing is right here in this moment and that you are not separate from that truth. Thought creates an illusory separation between you and God. In watching the thought of God or the thought that you must find God, the mind-created, illusory separation between you and God vanishes. What is left is the living reality of God in this moment, manifesting in a beautiful array of forms.

You believe you–a thought–are separate from this other thought–“happiness.” So you make efforts, chase after career advancements, seek relationships, and/or engage in spiritual practices to find this thing called happiness. You are looking for happiness in the future, not realizing that the very thought of future is merely a presently arising thought. When you believe that happiness is coming only through future, you deny yourself the happiness that is your true nature in this moment. You actually create your own unhappiness in this way. When that thought of future is made conscious, you are automatically here in this moment, where true happiness resides. The gap between you and happiness is merged. In truth, it is realized, through present moment awareness, that there never was a gap. You created it in your mental dream.

You believe you–a thought–are separate from this thing called enlightenment, spiritual awakening, or whatever it is you call your future liberation. So you read this website or that book to find this truth to which the word enlightenment is pointing. But, in fact, you are enlightenment. It is your birthright. It is the realization that truth is only ever now, in this moment, and that any attempt to seek it out obscures it. You cannot find it here on this website or in a book. You are it. Books and websites can merely point you to this moment. The quiet mind, in this moment, is a mind that is no longer looking for itself in time, in future, in books, and in websites. It sees that the whole notion that you are separate from enlightenment or spiritual awakening is an illusion of temporal separation created by thought. In noticing your mental thought that you must find enlightenment or have a spiritual awakening in the future, that thought dies on its own, and you are brought to the reality of this moment, where enlightenment already is. This moment is always showing you that life is already whole. Enlightenment cannot be found through thought. Thought can only point to this wholeness.

You believe you–a thought–are separate from this thing called love–another thought. You go looking for your love in books, in people, in every place but where it truly and already is. Love is who you already are under all the seeking energy. It is who you are in this moment when the mind stops its foolish game of chasing after its own illusions in time. How could love ever be separate from you? You cannot find love because you are love. In present moment awareness, you realize that the whole search for love was obscuring the unconditional love that is who you truly are.

In all these scenarios, the gap collapses. The dream of seeking dies. Conflict dies. If seeking or conflict arises again, you see it as illusion. This moment is realized to contain everything that you were seeking. That makes sense, doesn’t it? How could anything exist outside this moment? This moment is all there is. Nothing to seek. You are already whole. To be more accurate, there is no separate you to find or realize wholeness. When you give up this idea of a separate self who needs to find something, wholeness is realized as the natural state. Wholeness already is in this moment, beyond the story of separation thought tells.