The Dream of Choice
In non-duality teachings, a spiritual seeker might ask, “How can I reach enlightenment?” or “How can I bring about the shift called ‘non-duality’?” “Should I meditate more or engage in some other spiritual practice that will bring about enlightenment?” The teacher might respond, “Who is going to do it?” “Who is going to bring enlightenment about?” Who is going to engage in spiritual practices?” “There is no self. Therefore there is no choice or control.” The teacher is pointing to something that cannot be grasped by the intellect. The notion that there is no choice or control is not a philosophical statement or insight that the mind can wrap itself around. The teacher is inviting the seeker to look at what is real and true beyond belief, ideas, and philosophies (all of which are based in past conclusions). Enlightenment is not about believing anything or coming to some fancy philosophical conclusion regarding whether there is free will or choice. Enlightenment is the realization of no self. It is a totally alive realization, one that looks freshly and effortlessly in each moment. When liberation is realized, there is no separate person to be in control or to know or resist life anymore. The doer (i.e. the ego or dream self) is seen to be an illusion in enlightenment. How can there be choice if there is no doer to make the choice? This can frustrate the seeker unless it is realized what is really being said.
The dream of self is a dream of time. Time is a stream of thought (i.e., past, present, future). The dream self is a belief in a separate person with a past and a future who can choose to take action now to bring about some later event. Within the spiritual search, choice and control are based in personal motivation: “What can I do now to achieve something later?” The dream self falsely believes it is in control. It’s all about the “me” and what it can get.
Enlightenment is the realization of formlessness and timelessness. Stated another way, it is the realization of “no self” or selflessness. The entity called “me” is seen to be nothing more than thought forms. What is left is the formlessness in which those forms arise and fall. Time is seen to be nothing more than a mental stream of thoughts called past and future arising now. What is left is timelessness. Enlightenment is not about a denial of form or time. It is a realization of its illusory nature. The “me” is not denied. Its illusory, fleeting nature is seen. In seeing through that “me,” the Absolute is realized. You could call it Oneness, God, enlightenment, non-duality. The word is not the thing it describes. The realization of enlightenment is really the dropping away of all fixed ideas--not just the fixed idea that there is a self, not just fixed ideas about the self, but also fixed ideas about enlightenment.
So back to the question, “Is there anything I can do to bring about enlightenment?” Perhaps you can see now that, from the perspective of enlightenment, the question does not make sense. It assumes the existence of a separate person who can either engage or not engage in spiritual practices. It assumes the solid existence of a person with choice and control. Choice and control are aspects of the dream of self, which is a dream of self arising in the timeless, formless spirit.
It is not that there is nothing you can do to bring about enlightenment. It is that the doer who would seek to do these things is ultimately a phantom. In seeing that all spiritual practicing to bring about a result emanates from a central illusion of time and control (i.e., the dream of self), the possibility for liberation from that dream arises. Certainly, the appearance of choice and control arises within this dream called the spiritual search. Searching happens. Spiritual practicing happens. Doing happens. Enlightenment is not about stopping the search or ceasing all spiritual practices. But engaging in spiritual practices in the blind pursuit to bring about some later event called enlightenment just strengthens the dream of time and control. It strengthens or at least maintains the belief in a separate self, the very “thing” that is seen through in enlightenment.
Instead of asking whether there is anything you can do to reach enlightenment, simply notice what is already being done. The mind is constantly searching to bring about something else, something more. In that dream of thought, choice and control arise. Choice and control are based in personal motivation and gratification. Let me give you some examples. In the spiritual search, the dream self chooses to meditate based in the idea that meditation will bring about some later relaxation, quietness, or enlightenment. Or the dream self chooses to pray, believing that her present life circumstances are somehow not what God intended. Praying is often, but not always, motivated by the personal desire for life to be different than the way it already is. The dream self reads spiritual books because of a personal motivation to have or experience a spiritual awakening or obtain spiritual knowledge. This choosing, based in personal motivation, is not limited to spiritual matters. It happens in all facets of the dream. Just as an example, the dream self may believe that she needs to get this promotion or attain a certain level of social status so that others will give her the praise, acknowledgement, attention, or love that her story is lacking. All of this choosing emanates from the central idea that there is a “me” here, separate from the rest of life, who has control and who can choose to bring about something better.
The notion of choice is based on cause and effect. “I have control. Therefore, I will choose to engage in this or that spiritual practice to bring about enlightenment.” To the dream self on a spiritual search, the event of choosing is the cause and the spiritual awakening is the intended effect. Cause and effect is based in time. Time is merely presently arising thought. So cause and effect are part of the dream of personal will.
The realization of enlightenment is the realization that there is no separate person who is in control. It is the death of the personal will. In the dream of cause and effect, the dreamer is dreaming when she says that she is going to do something now to bring about something later. She does not actually have control. She cannot actually control the way life happens. She is not choosing. She is merely thinking. Thoughts are arising now. That’s it. In enlightenment, something beyond the personal will, beyond the doer, is seen to be controlling this thing called life and this body and mind known as “me.” Life is living itself.
So who is going to bring about enlightenment? Who is going to engage in spiritual practices? Who is this person that is going to choose to do or not do these things? Each time you buy into the idea of control, the idea that you can take action now to control a future outcome, you feed the idea of a separate self. You buy into the dream. Of course, there is no “you” to buy into the idea of “you.” To even say that makes it appear as if there are two here. In non-duality, it is realized that there is only Oneness. There is no person who can step outside of Oneness to somehow realize Oneness. The whole question of choice is seen to be nothing more than the game of seeking future outcomes through thought. In that way, choosing to take action to bring about enlightenment is just more seeking.
